How To Be The Gentle Leader Your Child Needs

A frustrated, exhausted mom wants to treat her 3 year old more gently and less punitively. Ironically, the way to do that may be to become a stronger leader. The freedom we all feel deep within ourselves comes once we understand where we stand in the scheme of things – Magda Gerber Janet, On a day when I felt like I have failed as a parent, I found your blog. I have read and read and read — article and...

Positive Parenting In The Tantrum Zone

Hi Janet, Basically, we’ve been in extreme tantrum zone for about 6 months now. They can be over things that seem relatively small – usually around independence. For example, today she had a tantrum because my husband put a straw in her smoothie instead of her doing it. Yesterday she had a tantrum because I was having an ultrasound and the technician wiped the jelly off my stomach instead of letting her...

RIE Parenting Bliss (A Brief Glimpse)

This two-minute video gem (uncovered by my clever husband Mike) illustrates the immediate benefits of independent play (a cornerstone of RIE parenting) far better than any of the thirty or so articles I’ve posted on the subject.  I’m humbled and thrilled to share this slice of parenting heaven. It’s reminiscent of scenes I often witnessed with my own children when they were small. Michael Caulder, the dad...

A Child’s Cry For Attention

Hi, Janet, a friend turned me on to your blog. I am the mother of 3 children — a son, Trevor, who will be 4 in March, and twin nearly-10-month old daughters Kiley and Morgan. Trevor has had quite a year. From Jan-April 2010, I was on hospital bed rest after Kiley’s water broke at 22 weeks. I came home in late April, and Kiley and Morgan came home in mid-May. Then, in August, we started Trevor at a new...

Mommy’s Pregnant – Toddler Is NOT Pleased

Hello Janet. I would love to hear your thoughts/advice on the apparent “stage” my son is going through. (I hesitate to call it that, since I am somewhat tired of being told it’s a stage, he’ll grow out of it, etc. But for lack of a better term, “stage” it is.) B has just turned three. I may be biased, but he is a bright, articulate, funny child who has, over the past few months,...

Sibling Struggles

Hi Janet, I am very fortunate to have been introduced to RIE, as my children’s childcare providers shifted to a RIE based program.  We have been very happy and impressed with this shift, and we are trying to incorporate much of the RIE philosophy into our own parenting.  I found it very helpful to read Magda Gerber’s books to get examples, and see scenarios to help guide my interactions.  I would love a...

Shy By Nature (Guest Post by Michael Lansbury)

Growing up, I was labeled a shy child. Silent and withdrawn in unfamiliar social situations, I was not the confident, gregarious kid who initiated games with other children, never mind conversations. I would hang back and watch as the others interacted, bringing as little attention to myself as possible. It always seemed that the other kids knew each other, that they were already comfortable friends, that I was the...

Uniquely Me – 6 Ways To Help Our Children Know (And Love) Themselves

I spend a lot of time in my head, and one of my favorite ponderings is nature vs. nurture.  How much does parenting matter?  We toil and we fret.  We read the latest round of confusing, conflicting studies and opinions.  We stimulate, teach, parent the way we were parented because it worked just fine, or do the radical opposite because it didn’t.  We hover, free-range, stress and (according to the New York...