Validating Feelings Isn’t Working

Podcast

The practice of acknowledging our children’s feelings and struggles can provide healing, calming messages of safety and acceptance. With a genuine tone and a few words, our acknowledgments can help children share pent-up emotions, feel seen and heard, and gradually regulate, which in turn eases problematic behaviors. However, parents commonly share with Janet that validating … Continued

When Troublesome Behavior Continues… and Continues

Podcast

Our children’s repeated behaviors can be baffling, exhausting, and sometimes infuriating, particularly after we’ve tried everything we can think of to make them stop. What are we missing? In this episode of Unruffled, Janet shares some of the common reasons behaviors persist and offers her actionable suggestions for helping our children (and ourselves) get unstuck. … Continued

How Do We Know When to Set a Boundary?

Podcast

In response to Janet’s article “When Your Child Seems Stuck Seeking Negative Attention,” a parent says her daughter will whine and cry while making “reasonable” requests for snuggles and food and play, but when she obliges, her daughter often then refuses those things. If she says no to her daughter’s requests, “it escalates into crying … Continued

7 Daily Reminders for Parents

Podcast

Inspired by a listener’s request, Janet offers a list of daily reminders that she hopes will help parents face the challenges of their day with more clarity, calmness, and confidence. For a deep and complete understanding of ALL these points and much, much more, check out Janet’s No Bad Kids Course.   Transcript of “7 … Continued

Finding Our Best Response to Children’s Turbulent Emotions

Podcast

Janet responds to emails from parents who describe struggling with their children’s strong emotions. One writes that her 2-year-old rejects her comfort when he has a meltdown: “It breaks my heart, and I feel like I must be doing something wrong.” Another writes that her 7-year-old says he doesn’t feel love from his mother. Another … Continued

Navigating the Playground with a Child Who Seems Too Physical, Shy, Huggy, or Bossy

Podcast

Janet offers her advice for navigating typical playground behaviors in preschool-aged children, such as physical aggression, bossiness and shyness. Whether our child is exhibiting these behaviors or is on the receiving end of another child’s dysregulation, Janet shares how helping children to feel understood, protected, and supported encourages the most positive learning process. Transcript of … Continued

When Your Child Keeps Ignoring Boundaries and Breaking Rules, Try This

Podcast

Three different families write to Janet about their children’s challenging behaviors. In one case, a 2.5-year-old has resumed an old behavior of hitting and scratching, “but this time around it feels like he’s doing it with more purpose.” Another parent says that when their 5-year-old exhibits rude behavior and is called on it, he gets … Continued

Dealing with Judgmental Comments about Our Parenting

Podcast

A parent is concerned about the negative, judgmental comments her parents and in-laws make about her children’s behavior and their parenting. She writes that she and her husband try to implement Janet’s advice (with a mix of Montessori). While she says she isn’t personally offended by their old school opinions, she does worry about “the … Continued

Our Expectations Can Make Us Feel Like Failures

Podcast

Janet consults with a parent who says she feels utterly exasperated by her two young boys’ difficult behaviors. While she has a clear image of the kind of gentle, empathetic parent she wants to be, she says she loses her patience more often than not, and at the end of the day feels like a … Continued