After reading Janet’s book, No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame, a parent has some practical follow-up questions about his daughter’s behaviors; specifically in regard to tantrums, mealtime boundaries, and cooperation in cleaning up her messes. This dad says there are certain “values/etiquette” he would like his daughter to learn, but he realizes these qualities … Continued
In this episode: Janet responds to an email from a parent says she feels like a failure when dealing with her two-year-old’s tantrums. She writes: “We’ve been great at heading them off before they begin and recognizing why they’re happening, but we are completely at a loss what to do once we’re stuck with one.” … Continued
In this episode: A parent writes that her 18-month-old “has been testing the limits with tantrums.” At home, she and her husband try to ignore the behavior or redirect. In public, however, they tend to give in to their daughter’s demands. She writes, “I’d hate for her to learn she get her way by throwing … Continued
In this episode: A parent writes that her 2-year-old is deep in a “want to do it myself” phase. While she recognizes her son’s need for autonomy and self-sufficiency, she admits that she often runs out of patience, which results in him having a full blown meltdown or tantrum. She’s wondering how she might “set … Continued
In this episode: Janet considers a letter from a mother struggling with her toddler’s meltdowns and wondering how to connect with respect and compassion. Hi. This is Janet Lansbury, and I’m going to be talking today in Janet Lansbury Unruffled about how to acknowledge feelings and connect. This is a question I received on Facebook: … Continued
I’ve hesitated to share this secret because I worry it seems silly. Then it occurred to me that if I’m really striving to provide a complete parenting “toolbox” on this blog, I can’t not include a practice, however inane, that has been essential to my own sanity and to raising three kids who are healthier … Continued
Hi Janet, I need some advice. Mia has gotten into screaming tantrums if we ask her to do anything she might not want to do: wear blue pants, come to dinner, brush her teeth. During the day I’m good at remaining calm, ignoring the tantrum, and then she stops really quickly. Recently, she’s started screaming about … Continued
A parent writes that her 5-year-old has never recovered from the arrival of her younger brother (now 3.5 yrs). “Since he was born, she has subjected him to physical violence and verbal taunting.” She describes her daughter as bright and strong-willed, and her son as gentle, loving and forgiving. She says she has tried everything … Continued
Two families reach out to Janet for help because they are struggling to get work done at home. Separating from their young children causes whining, crying and tantrums, which in turn interrupts and frustrates the parents. One parent writes: ”My son has significant tantrums about why daddy has to work… I really can’t take the … Continued
Is it okay to show emotion to our kids? Is it helpful? Too unsettling? A parent has questions for Janet about modeling self-regulation and healthy emotional expression to children. She writes: “These feel like life skills that are harder to explain to your child but can be shown in practice.” So, this mom wants to … Continued
A parent shares that she is frustrated and exhausted by her son’s clingy behavior. She describes a typical evening arriving home from work to find her boy waiting by the door, insisting she drop everything to sit down and play with him. If she tries to use the restroom, put some things away or eat … Continued
Janet responds to a Facebook post from a parent who shares her personal dismay “at what children across the globe suffer and what they go without,” and she is distraught by her own children’s apparent lack of gratitude and humility. While this mom admits her current mood may be the result of “post-Christmas blues,” she … Continued
A parent writes that her toddler is very aware of his emotions and even has several strategies to cope with the negative ones. One of these strategies is going to his room by himself. While this mom is “happy that he is aware of his emotions and (usually) redirects them before causing harm or throwing … Continued
