In this episode: Janet replies to the parent of an active 7-month-old who worries that their otherwise respectful relationship is jeopardized by constant struggles at bedtime that are upsetting to her and her baby.
Struggles With Dressing And Diaper Changes
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My 9-month-old sometimes acts as if diapering and changing are synonymous with torture! I have been using the tips from your book, but there are still times when he twists and turns and I can’t keep him in place. How can I communicate to him that I am his ally, and to help him enjoy these times more?
Slow down, be flexible, invite participation and acknowledge and allow ALL feelings. Also, respectfully hold him in place sometimes as need… “I need to hold you this way for just a moment so I can finish wiping… There. Ah, you didn’t like that!”
Janet? My 2.5 year old has suddenly started doing this. I can’t hold her down. I’ve tried talking, allowing the feelings, offering her choices, agency in helping me, “When you’re ready “, etc. all in genuine good faith and respect. Nothing is working and we face this struggle daily. We don’t always have the time for this. What do we do? What is she trying to communicate with this? There are other defiant behaviors that we can handle much easier (teeth brushing struggles, for example). But I feel powerless with this one. And I know I am, but how do we get through this?