Can Babies Love Too Much? – Teaching Children To Give Affection With Respect

I’m not one to question the value of demonstrative love and affection.  Giving hugs is such a reflex for me that I embarrass myself by hugging people I barely know. I’ll often come to my senses midway through the ‘hello’ or ‘goodbye’ hug — too late to catch myself. This creates some awkward moments, but (I hope) my kind intentions are understood.   But with children, especially infants and...

The Baby Social Scene – 5 Hints For Creating Safe And Joyful Playgroups

A recent post, Is Your Baby A Bully? Genius? Shy? Why We Should Lose Labels, stirred up unexpected controversy. Several parents were apparently shocked by my suggestion that babies could play together with minimal intervention, without adults reminding the babies to share, or asking them to give something back because “so-and-so had it first”.  The comments that surprised me most...

No Bad Kids – Toddler Discipline Without Shame (9 Guidelines)

A toddler acting out is not shameful, nor is it behavior that needs punishing. It’s a cry for attention, a shout-out for sleep, or a call to action for firmer, more consistent limits. It is the push-pull of your toddler testing his burgeoning independence. He has the overwhelming impulse to step out of bounds, while also desperately needing to know he is securely reined in. There is no question that children need...

You’ll Be Sorry – Children and Apologies

Parenting can be a humbling and embarrassing experience, especially when we find ourselves at the mercy of our children’s guilelessness. Children say and do what they feel. While this instinct is endearing, even admirable, it can also be a bit awkward in the moment when, for example, our daughter spots a topless man in the market and shouts, “He’s so hairy!” (Of course, he may have deserved that, and we do...

The S Word (Share!)

It is chanted on every playground and enforced at the park, parties and play dates. It is a word that has become the social mantra for parents of toddlers everywhere: Share! We are all desperate for our children to share. Sharing is vital. The future of the world depends upon our children’s spirit of generosity. We fear that if we don’t remind our child to share, he might become a selfish, stingy outcast. Or, we...

A Toddler’s Need for Boundaries – No Walk in the Park

When an infant approaches the end of his first year, parents begin to struggle with boundaries. Soft-hearted parents allow a child to climb all over them in my parent/infant class. The child is searching for limits and boundaries for his behavior. But moms and dads are often afraid to say, “I don’t want you to climb on me. You can sit with me. If you need to climb, there is a climbing structure over there.”...