Crying and Tantrums

Parent Do-Overs – 7 Confidence Building Responses

If parenting were film acting, we’d always be brilliant because we’d have plenty of “takes” to perfect our responses (not to mention make-up, hair styling and ridiculously high salaries).  But we are playing a part — the role of a lifetime for a lifetime.  Luckily, we perform for an adoring, forgiving audience, and our children will usually accept our less thoughtful, less than stellar performances....

Car Seat Tantrums – Handled With Respect

True story: Holly was a tentative mom, someone who avoided setting limits. She told me she was having an impossible time getting three-year-old Eliza to sit in her car seat. She screamed, threw a fit and flat out refused to cooperate. I recommended to Holly that she say, “I know you don’t want to, but you must sit in your car seat” and then physically place Eliza into the seat. Holly reported back to me that...

100% Fool-Proof Parenting (7 Key Ingredients)

“You know what I have found- NOTHING works all the time.  I hear people saying that peaceful parenting doesn’t work and I hear people saying that spanking doesn’t work.  Frankly, I can’t think of anything that is 100% fool proof and works for every child all the time.” – Mama Birth I hear (or read) statements like Mama Birth’s all the time.  It doesn’t matter what school of child care...

Helping Babies Sleep (With Empathy And Compassion) Guest Post by Eileen Henry

Hi Janet, My baby boy is 6 months old, and we do all we can to make sure he is happy and healthy. We realize how important good, uninterrupted, restorative sleep is – both night sleep and daytime naps – and I wonder how you might respond to the philosophy of Dr. Marc Weissbluth (“Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child”), who advocates letting a baby over 4 months cry up to one hour for naps and an unlimited time...

The Key To Your Child’s Heart (7 Ways It Works)

Write this word on your hand. It’s a magical way to connect with a child of any age, can ease tears and tantrums and even prevent them.  It’s a simple but surprisingly challenging thing to do, particularly tough to remember in the heat the moment…  Acknowledge. Before you tell your child that it’s time to leave the park, or remind him that the really cool truck he’s examining has to stay at the store,...

“We Don’t Want To Spank”

Hi Janet, I am 9 weeks pregnant with baby #2 and my son is now 14 months old. He is a very happy boy, but loves getting into EVERYTHING! When we say no, he has started throwing tantrums, crying, flailing himself as we try to pick him up, etc. He also pinches my face, scratches my arm, hits me and grabs my glasses. Lately we have had a lot of stress in our life due to circumstances out of our control, but my son has...

A Toddler’s Grief – A Gift Of Grace

“You’re okay,” is repeatedly told to a child who hurts himself and does not feel okay. I would much rather give the child permission to feel the way she feels and then wait it out. Again the magic “waiting” works, because emotions have their beginning and their end — even tantrums have a beginning and an end.”  Magda Gerber, Dear Parent: Caring for Infants With Respect Eva, the 15 month old toddler...

The Truth About Infant Self-Soothing

Infant self-soothing is often misrepresented by descriptive terms like tough love, crying it out, leaving babies to “deal with it” on their own, and even neglect. Apparently there are people who misunderstand the concept, or use it as an excuse to ignore a child. Perhaps it’s in reaction to those people, real or imagined, that others have wholly rejected the idea, shutting the door on the possibility that...