Toddlers Invent The Silliest Games (And 33 More Reasons To Let Babies Play Their Way)

There’s a reason I never tire of writing about inner-directed play. Infant and toddler playtime is parenting gold. Creating a safe play environment allows us a well-deserved, occasional break, and if we sit nearby, observe and respond, playtime can provide a wealth of inspiration. Parents are typically in short supply of both those things. Can we ever get enough rest or inspiration?  Thrilled and relieved to be...

Tummy Time – Troubles, Frustration And Trust

I recently received an email from Lily, who is encouraging her 6 month old baby to play independently and had questions about his frustration with toys. She kindly allowed me to share it with you (not the frustration or the toys…just the email): “I loved your post about giving babies independent play time. I have a 6 month old little boy who is super easy and wonderful. When I read about giving him time to...

A Lesson From Babies…It’s Okay To Struggle

Last week’s parent/toddler class was all about feeling ‘stuck’.  The previous week, 21 month old Audrey had wedged herself between the bars of the wooden climbing structure and looked at me with a worried expression. “Are you stuck?” I asked. I moved close and — without touching her — talked her through pulling her legs out from between the bars and reaching to the bar below so that she could...

Is Your Baby A Bully? Smart? Shy? Why We Should Lose Labels

Wouldn’t we all like the freedom to reinvent ourselves? I know I would. For example, I’ve been pegged (can’t imagine why) as an “un-domestic” type, lacking talent and confidence in the kitchen, never living down the fact that I had no idea how to make a cup of tea until I was forced to learn (in a panic) while waiting tables at Marie Callender’s at 15, a job I quit (to no one’s surprise) after two...

Praising Children, Risking Failure

I was thrilled to read a recent New York Magazine article by Po Bronson about children and the perils of praise. In “How Not to Talk to Your Kids”, the author reports findings from a new study involving fifth-graders from a dozen New York public schools. Children in the study were given an easy series of puzzles. Afterwards, each child was given his score. Half of them received brief praise for their...

A Baby Ready For Kindergarten, College, and Life

A parent recently asked my advice about choosing a preschool for her son. I responded with my belief that the purpose of preschool is socialization, and that a developmental ‘learn through play’ program is best. She agreed in theory, but admitted she worries about kindergarten readiness. Will a school that does not teach academics provide enough preparation for Kindergarten?   This made me think — what...

A Hovering Parent’s Successful Landing

Hovering parents are taking a beating in the media these days. In an avalanche of recent articles, they are shamed, scolded and mocked for hyper-involvement in their children’s lives. ‘Experts’ are coming out of the woodwork with smug superiority, issuing dire warnings about the anxious, insecure children hovering parents are raising. We’re getting an earful about the problems, but zilch in the way of...

Our Children Choose Us

Many of us have the sense that the children in our care chose us. We feel it especially when a child’s needs tap into our weaknesses, we are forced to adjust, and that adjustment makes us change for the better.  It is as if their souls zeroed in on us and decided, “That woman and that man, those future brothers and sisters need lessons I can provide. I’ll help them grow.  I’ll be their teacher.”   I...