Can You Say “Yes”?

My sisters and I had my mom pegged, and we never grew tired of teasing her about it. When we asked my mom for something and she said, “We’ll see”, it always seemed to lead to a “no”. “Maybe” usually turned out to mean “yes”. So we would whine and beg, “Just say maybe, pleeeeeze!”  Now that I’m a mom and have learned that parenting is an endless list of really hard decisions that can make...

A Creative Alternative To Baby TV Time

The last thing you’re going to catch me doing is provoking parental guilt. So, I’m going to assume you’ve heard all about the hazards of TV for infants and toddlers: potential language delays, obesity, ADHD, and aggression are all things we’d like to prevent in our children if we can. But it doesn’t surprise me that parents ignore the research (and the American Academy of Pediatrics advisory) and turn on...

Games My Kids Beg To Play

This is my kind of silliness. These family games are creative, simple, and spontaneous. They need almost no preparation and only minimal equipment, just household stuff. They are unplugged, screen-free, non-board games that un-bore children, and they are all about playing rather than producing something, or winning and losing. Best of all, they don’t cause mess-ups that disappoint everyone and make a parent...

How To Help Your Baby Become A Math Genius (Or Not)

Raise your hand if you don’t want a brilliant child. Honestly. Ensuring our child’s good health, happiness, kindness and compassion may well be our highest priorities, but wouldn’t we do all in our power to have the brightest, most talented, top-of-the-class kid? Or, at least, one who doesn’t have to struggle too hard to make the grade? And here is where it gets really unfair. If we didn’t have enough...

Back To The Sandbox

Oh, for those simpler days when the children were small. It sure didn’t feel easy back then, but taking in the view through our kitchen window in the early evening light, I can’t help but reminisce about blissful times with my babies, before they became: 1) a teenager accelerating down PCH; 2) a sage, but moody adolescent growing an inch every month; and 3) a rambunctious boy who has to squeeze time in between...

What Your Baby Can’t Tell You

Years ago, I had a major awakening. It hit me that my three month old baby was an actual person. I had brought her to a parenting class and was asked to place her on her back on a blanket next to me, where she lay for two hours — peaceful, alert, engaged, and self-contained.  She didn’t make a sound, but I felt the power of her presence, a self-assuredness that at age 17 still knocks my socks off.  If you...

A Letter That Changed My Day

I was in a gloomy, what’s-it-all-about funk recently when I received something miraculous — a letter that changed everything. Touched, flattered and gratified on many levels by this note, the passion I usually have for my work was instantly invigorated.  I share the letter here because it resonates with me, reminding me of the intense moment of recognition I had when I first discovered infant expert Magda...

A Child’s Creativity (How I Learned to Shut Up)

Years ago, my two-and-a-half-year-old daughter was coloring Easter eggs. She had dipped an egg into the purple-dye cup and was about to blend it with yellow dye, when I stopped her. “You might not like the way those colors will look together,” I warned.  Willful girl that she’s always been, she overruled me and proceeded to mix colors that I was certain would combine to look like a putrid shade of late...