elevating child care

You’re Not My Mommy

Raising babies with respect begins with perceiving them as competent, aware individuals rather than cute blobs that are mindless or “half-baked” (no joke — a psychologist used that descriptor in her Psychology Today column).  Perceiving babies as whole people is by far the most rewarding, successful parenting path and is finally now research-proven. Yes, it can be less convenient at times, because it...

No Bad Parents (Guest Post by Michael Lansbury)

As a fan of Janet’s work and her website, this is a reader comment I come across occasionally: “Oh, great! Another article that makes me feel like a bad parent.” Well, not this article. Nope. This article wants to assure you that nothing Janet writes about respectful parenting is designed to intimidate or humiliate, but only to inform, educate, and to offer readers a shot at a parenting experience beyond their...

How Respect Makes Parenting Easier

Every so often I receive a critical comment along the lines of this one: “…reading things such as ‘I asked my baby if she wanted me to lift her up and with the slightest nod of yes, I did’ (not exact quote) — when talking about a month-old baby — makes me want to laugh. It is true that babies, infants and toddlers should be treated with respect, and I adhere to the notion of the calm...

When Children Prefer One Parent

Our three year old daughter has started showing a strong preference for Mommy, especially at bedtime.  We are trying to be positive and respectful of her wishes, but I am expecting another child in May, and we need to set boundaries about my availability to her.  Thus far, setting boundaries often leads to tears, shouting, and temper tantrums that include hitting Daddy.  It does go better when we talk it out with...

The Key to Cooperation (How to Stop Reacting and Start Connecting)

Acceptance is the one of the most loving gifts we can offer another human being, and it is especially crucial in our relationships with children. From the moment they are born, our children are receiving formative messages from us about their worth, their place in the world and in our hearts. To develop a sense of security and self-confidence, they need us to at least attempt to accept, acknowledge, and understand...

The Hurt We Can’t Fix

A common fantasy we have as parents is the eternal preservation of our children’s innocence. It would be so nice if we could shelter them from the harsher realities of life.  And if we can’t prevent the inevitable bumps and bruises that life deals, we’d at least like to have the power to fix the damage; kiss our kids’ booboos and make them all better. In this post, my husband Mike shares his personal...

Recognizing Sensory Processing Disorders (SPD): Guest Post by Jonathan Evans

I regularly receive comments from parents expressing appreciation for the respectful parenting approach I share on my blog (Magda Gerber’s RIE approach). Occasionally, these same parents will then assert that this could not possibly work for their child with high needs or special needs, for any number of reasons. Over the years, I have consulted with many experts on the subject of RIE and children with special...

The Glorious Freedom of a Capable Child

My favorite part of blogging are the stories parents and caregivers share with me from all over the world. While the details are always slightly different, the stories usually begin with a common experience: feeling dissatisfied, frustrated or unsuccessful, they sought answers. And just like me way back when, they didn’t really know what they were looking for – just something that felt right. They somehow...

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