Crying and Tantrums

The Key To Your Child’s Heart (7 Ways It Works)

Write this word on your hand. It’s a magical way to connect with a child of any age, can ease tears and tantrums and even prevent them.  It’s a simple but surprisingly challenging thing to do, particularly tough to remember in the heat the moment… Acknowledge. Before you tell your child that it’s time to leave the park, or remind him that the really cool truck he’s examining has to stay at the store,...

“We Don’t Want To Spank”

Hi Janet, I am 9 weeks pregnant with baby #2 and my son is now 14 months old. He is a very happy boy, but loves getting into EVERYTHING! When we say no, he has started throwing tantrums, crying, flailing himself as we try to pick him up, etc. He also pinches my face, scratches my arm, hits me and grabs my glasses. Lately we have had a lot of stress in our life due to circumstances out of our control, but my son has...

A Toddler’s Grief – A Gift Of Grace

“You’re okay,” is repeatedly told to a child who hurts himself and does not feel okay. I would much rather give the child permission to feel the way she feels and then wait it out. Again the magic “waiting” works, because emotions have their beginning and their end — even tantrums have a beginning and an end.”  Magda Gerber, Dear Parent: Caring for Infants With Respect Eva, the 15 month old toddler...

The Truth About Infant Self-Soothing

Infant self-soothing is often misrepresented by descriptive terms like tough love, crying it out, leaving babies to “deal with it” on their own, and even neglect. Apparently there are people who misunderstand the concept, or use it as an excuse to ignore a child. Perhaps it’s in reaction to those people, real or imagined, that others have wholly rejected the idea, shutting the door on the possibility that...

When Toddlers Scream

hi, janet.  i’m a former actor, current Ph.D. student and mom of a 15-month-old.  your website and your advice have been really inspirational as his father and i navigate early parenthood . . . mostly joyfully, although we get as tired as anyone.  i thought this question might have relevance for your audience, so if you get a chance to consider it, many thanks.  Miles is a pretty easy going kid, and...

The Happiest Kids Don’t Have To Smile

Have you ever been stunned into silence discovering that a longtime acquaintance’s parenting beliefs were radically different than yours? That happened to me recently when a woman I’ve known for several years shared what she called the “unusual” way she and her husband had handled her toddler’s numerous tantrums. She giggled as she told me how they turned on the Eagles song “Get Over It” and loudly...

7 Reasons To Calm Down About Babies Crying

There are people who don’t mind hearing babies cry. They ignore a baby in distress, won’t pick the baby up ‘so as not to spoil him’, think nothing of leaving babies crying alone for hours in a dark room. I know these people exist because I read articles about them all time. But seriously, who are they? In my 18 ½ years as a mother, 16 years as a parent educator and 2 years blogging, I’ve never...

Why The Whining? (And 4 Steps To Eventual Peace)

A child whining, specifically my child whining, has got to be the most torturous sound I can imagine.  I’d rather be trapped in a car with the alarm going off, or locked in an Urban Outfitters dressing room with that monotonous techno music they play pulsing at full blast…  Maybe that’s because whining is not only earsplitting — it makes me feel intensely pressured to do something, to fix something...